2001-05-07
1:41 a.m.

This is a letter to my mom that I am going to give her on Mother's Day. It started out as an entry for the gratitude ring, but it kind of morphed into this:

Dear Mom,

I have been fortunate in my to have numerous people help to sculpt me into the person I am today. I have fed off of the wisdom and thoughts of all I have met, but you, Mom, have affected me the most. I mean that in a good way too.

When I was little, you taught me that no matter what dreams and desires I had, they were not impossible. You made sure that I held on to my dreams, and you did everything in your power to make as many dreams come true as you could. This has helped to sculpt my outlook on life, as well as how I view myself. Now that I am older, when I have a wish, or a dream, I got for it, no matter how far away and impossible it may seem. You gave me that courage, Mom, you instilled that strength in me.

You also taught me to follow my heart, regardless of what other people thought or said. When you saw how much being around horses changed me, made that shy child that I was become an outgoing happy child, you went against everyone to give that to me. Your parents said it was stupid, your sisters said it was crazy, my dad said it was dangerous, but you knew in your heart it was the best thing for me. You knew that my happiness was more important than other people's thoughts. Thank you for that, Mom, those horses, they gave me some of the happiest times of my life. You also learned to respect what my heart told me. Even when you didn't agree with me, with what my heart was telling me, such as my feelings toward Jenn, and women in general, you showed me respect, allowing me to make my own choices and mistakes. Without that, Mom, I wouldn't be the inspiration that people think I am, I wouldn't be able to express my heart. Thank you so much for teaching me not to fear what my heart tells me, but to embrace it.

You also made sure that I knew that there wasn't a single person out there who could own or control my soul. I am my own person, and there isn't a person out there who can change that. You made it clear that there wasn't a single person out there that was worth changing myself for. You taught me that my opinions, my thoughts, they do matter. If I feel strongly about something, I should make my opinion known. I should be seen, and heard. You've given my my firey personality, thank you, Mom.

All in all, I am your creation. Everytime you smile, telling me what a wonderful child I am, know that it is your doing. Almost every good thing in me comes from you, you are my inspiration, you inspire me to be who I am. So, thank you Mom.

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