September 16, 2002
10:48 a.m.

Sometimes I wish I could just hide my head in the sand, pretend that I am ignorant of all the events that go on around me. That's not really life though is it?

I am not ignorant, I know the truth, but I keep hoping that maybe, just maybe, if I close my eyes, it will all go away. I know it won't. It takes more than one person, more than just me.

I stayed after work for a while yesterday, talking to Dr. C. She's sort of become a confidante of mine, something I never imagined she would be. The woman that wears all black, and hates people, a trusted friend? Don't judge a book by it's cover.

Mom asked me for more money. I work seven days a week, and I don't see a penny of what I earn. I have no money in my college fund, it's all gone, the account closed up. Right now, there are five people living in my house hold, I am the only one working. I can't keep doing it, pouring my blood and sweat into something, but not getting anything for it. I am tired.

I am tired of dreaming an impossible dream. I keep asking, hoping that it will work out, but it doesn't. It won't.

I don't even know which thing I am talking about anymore.



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