2001-10-05
7:09 p.m.

The other day at the clinic, I was walking back into the kennel area, when I saw Dr. C eating french fries in front of a dog's kennel. I stayed quiet for a moment, watching, as she would eat a french fry, and pass the next one through the wire to the dog. I very rarely get to watch Dr. C our of her practiced professional doctor mode. She was talking to the dog softly, and I couldn't hear what she was saying, but every once in a while, she would give a half grin as she passed another french fry to the dog. I quietly backed out of the kennel, leaving her alone with her thoughts.

The dog she was talking to was a dog by the name of Merlin. He was a large grey and black great dane that had been at the clinic for almost a month. He had gotten a cut on his paw back in June, and the owner hadn't taken good care of it, so the leg became infected. The owner waited until september to bring the dog in to be checked out. When Merlin came in, his back leg was swollen three times it's normal size, he had a temperature of 105.6, and his scrotem was extremely swollen and hard. We had been fighting this dog's infection for a month, and he had quickly grown on us all. He never seemed to fuss about the nine pills we had to shove down his throat twice a day, nor the constant soaking of his leg. He never snapped at anyone, even when our minstrations to his leg had to be quite painful. Merlin managed to worm his way into Dr. C's heart, and I watched her struggle every day to make this dog better. The infection managed to spread to both of his eyes, which rendered him almost blind, but Dr. C didn't give up. Often, when she would disappear, she could be found back in the kennel area with Merlin. Even with all the drugs we were giving him, the infection spread to his lungs. Monday evening, the day of the french fry feeding, I saw Dr. C's worried expression as she listened to his chest. She gave him a pat on the head, and fed him a can of cat food, which no dog seems to be able to resist. He hardly had the strength to eat it.

I had become attatched to this dog as well, often spending twenty minutes with him, soaking his leg and talking soothingly to him. Tuesday when I went in, Dr. C pulled me asside.
Dr. C:(quietly)Has anyone told you yet?
Me: Told me? No..
Dr. C: (pause)Merlin (voice cracks) died this morning.
Me:I'm sorry..I..are you okay
Dr. C:(trying not to cry)He died this morning before I got in, I couldn't help him.
Me: You did everything you could, I watched you, and I know you tried your best.
If you knew Dr. C, you would realize how strange this was. Dr. C, she never really lets anyone know how she feels, and she certainly never lets anyone see how close she is to crying. Hearing the defeat in her voice, it was something I didn't know how to deal with. I didn't know what to do, so I just kind of stood there, looking like an idiot while she tried to compose herself.

I went back into the kennel, where his body still lay, a sheet draped over it, waiting for his owner to come and pick him up. Two french fries still laid in his bowl. I sat there for a few minutes, just thinking about what life throws at us. I gave Merlin a final pat, and placed the sheet back over his body. I think, in his own way, Merlin was there to help us. He gave me "someone" to talk to, and I think he made Dr. C remember that she is only human. His death seemed to open her up a little, it opened me a little too.

Later that day, she was holding Sparky, a kitten that we saved from being destroyed. Sparky had bitten down on an electical cord, burning a hole in the top of her mouth, right through to her nasal cavity. When every Sparky eats, half of it comes back up her nose. Well, as Dr. C held her, sparky looks warmly up into Dr. C's eyes, and lets loose a huge sneeze. As Dr. C glares at the kitten, wiping off her face, I try to hold back my laughter. Dr. C turns toward me, and evil grin appearing on her face, as she points sparky toward my face, practically chasing me around the clinic. Dr. C hasn't been in that good of spirits in a while, so it was nice to see her like that.

I don't know, I guess sometimes, people, and animals, come into our lives for a short time, but can change us for the better. So, next time you share french fries with someone, just remember you never know how they will affect your life.



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