2001-08-05
5:18 p.m.

I disappointed myself. I broke a promise I had made, but I set her free. I turned away. I let the friendship, which had been tetering on the edge, fall, and shatter. Maybe now she can be happy. Maybe now she won't be hurting so much. Me? I'll deal with it I guess. Did I make the right decision? I'll never know, but it's something that I will have to live with. I just didn't really want her to hurt anymore, so I did the only thing I could think of to do. The future isn't set in stone, so who knows what is in store.

Last night, the clinic had it's Fourth of July get together. Sure, a month late, but who's really counting. I had a really great time. I ran into a lady that I took riding lessons from. I had to quit because of my social anxiety disorder, and I have been too afraid to call and ask for them again, but she walked up to me, and asked when I would be able to start back. So, that's something I am looking foward to. Then, Kathy, who was a little drunk at this point, walked up to my mom, and started talking about me. My face was about ten shades of red. I don't take compliments very well...I never know what to say, but here is Kathy, making a speach about how wonderful I am. It was so embarassing, but my mom was all smiles..it couldn't have had anything to do with the third 'sex on the beach' shot I am sure..

I am really behind on E-mails, so if you have sent me one, and I haven't replied, don't worry, I am really trying. I have been sick as a dog all week, still am, plus, I have been working. Those two things together makes a person very very tired. I'll try to get to everyone eventually.

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