2001-07-05
5:52 p.m.

Thank you guys for giving me support, but I'm not the one who needs it right now. Yes, I'm hurt, and angry, but I am okay. Right now, Jenn needs to know that there are people there for her as well. Don't be angry with her, she is her own person, and she can have her opinions. Yes, they are like a knife to the heart, but they don't make me love her any less. She's beautiful to me, and even if she does hate me for the rest of my life, I still know what her love was like, and what it was like to love her. All those memories, they are enough to make me happy for a life time.

I spent twelve hours at the vet's today, I was only supposed to go in for six. We jsut got busy toward the end, and I ended up being the only one that stayed behind to help the doctor with an emergency call. I think he is going to hire me after summer is over, so it was worth the extra hours. I managed to stick myself with a needle today, quite painful. I really am getting better around there. I was allowed to give atropine today, and the doc trusted me enough to not even check my dossage or anything. It felt good to be trusted like that.

Yesterday, we had a rain storm in the afternoon. It was raining really hard, and all the young children were running around in it, and I kind of smiled, and as my cousin stared at me in disbelief, I went out into the rain, and stood there. My face was looking toward the sky, my arms outstretched, as the rain soaked through my shirt. I loved it. It reminded me of being little, of a time when I was so free. I came back under the shelter, and my cousin asked me why I had done that. I just smiled, and said because I wanted to be free. She gave me a weird look, and shrugged.

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